Friday, February 25, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
“I told Tamsin I would write tonight,” I said to Cam as I took up my laptop, heading for the bedroom.
“You should mention that it’s been a few years since anyone confiscated anything from you,” he smiled.
This is what I found on my pillow.
Cameron and I were married 31 years ago. We had planned a Valentine’s Day wedding, and then, in mid-December, he said, “Let’s just do it now! Why wait?” So, two weeks later and less than six months after our first date, we were wed by our Bishop in front of a few friends and family members, and it seemed perfect to us at the time. In my mind, ours was a love story fit for a sonnet.
I’d like to say that every moment of every day since has been pure bliss, that we never had financial woes, that our health has been perfect, and that we never once raised our voices to one another or said hurtful things. I’d like to say that there were never heartaches, that we were always perfect spouses to one another and perfect parents to our brood of five children.
What I can say is that we tried. In a time and a world where marriage seems to be slipping away, we are still trying. (Sometimes very trying.)
Finding things on my pillow is not a rare occurrence. My often cantankerous husband has a heart of marshmallow. He brings me flowers and jewelry and cards. He fixes things and assembles things and SHOWS me he loves me. He’s a doer. I’m a sayer.
If I thought I possessed the secret to a long and happy marriage, what I would share is this:
1. Work every day to see the traits you originally fell in love with. See the good in the person he/she has become so that you can fall in love over and over again.
2. Forget about changing your spouse. There is only one person you can change and it isn’t him/her. Focusing on your own efforts, without keeping score, is the way to marital happiness. (Sometimes easier said than done, but well worth the effort.)
3. The very few things that make your spouse feel really cherished take a surprisingly small amount of time each day. Give up a time-waster or two and focus on those few things.
4. Laugh every day.
5. And just like you learned in Kindergarten: Be nice. Share, Say “I’m sorry”, and “please” and “thank you” and “I love you”. (Or, like us, “I love you most.”)
I know it’s not the same for everyone. We are the lucky ones. And sharing a belief in something larger than ourselves has been the divine glue holding us together. Yes, we are the lucky ones.
Monday, February 7, 2011
- Celebrate. I don't care who you are, who you're with or where you are. This is one of those "be-your-own-rainbow" type situations where you're not going to have any fun unless you are the fun.
- Throw the rules out the window. Give up on any preconceived notions of what Valentine's Day should be, and start making it what you want to be.
Which is really where I'm going with all of this: If you want to have a happy Valentine's Day, then have a happy Valentine's Day. Whether you'll be celebrating yourself by yourself, with friends, family or your loved one, make it happy. Your own kind of happy.
Image borrowed here.
- As we are in the week leading up to Valentines Day/Singles Awareness Day, this week we will each be writing a post about our thoughts on V-day.
- A first for MHHT! We will be joined this week by a very special guest star, so be sure to come back on Wednesday to see who it is :)
- Another first! Madsta's laptop has been confiscated and placed under lock and key for the week. The laptop has been reported to being held somewhere in the vicinity of the paternal study. Several liberation attempts have been made, but the laptop remains incarcerated. We will continue to follow this story throughout the week, and will keep you updated as new developments occur.
- Please return later today as Tamsin will be posting her Guide to Valentine's Day.
Friday, February 4, 2011
When my Dad was young, I've always lived here- It's familiar, like my poodle.
I am a creature of Habit; I read the same blogs each day, visit the same websites, and some time's, wear the same tights- because who has that many pairs? (for example, this week alone, I've put my thumb through two pairs)
I also frequent the same places, moan about the same things and drink from the same kind of water bottle.
I like living where I live, I like that if the mood so takes us my girlfriends and I can hop on a train and be in Oxford street, or Trafalgar square- portabello road, The National Gallery, shepherds bush or Camden In under an hour.
For example, tomorrow I'm being paid to try and sort through my Mutti's wardrobe (those that enter rarely leave)- but if the inspiration so took I could head to Topshop, oxford circus.
To me, that is cool.
Ruislip people, is where it's at. I think.
I love it in the summertime- because we can go to the park through the gate in my back garden, or head to the fields and our favourite spot- the bridge, where we sit and listen to the trickling stream and tan our chests in the summertime.